David Zapatka
Reader Linda Walker writes, “I was studying the Bible and wanted to know the opposite of jealousy. Google AI Gemini told me of a new word, “compersion.” It said, ‘Jealousy is the feeling of resentment or anger toward someone because they possess something you desire. Compersion is the feeling of joy or contentment when someone you care about experiences happiness, even if that happiness doesn’t directly involve you. For example, feeling happy for your partner when they succeed in their career, even if it means they’ll be busier, would be an example of compersion.”
Thank you, Linda. I appreciate your contribution and found this word interesting.
Compersion—cum·per·tion; kuhm-per-zhuhn, -shuhn; noun
Origin and Etymology—Coined by the Kerista Community in the 1970s, probably following the model of dispersion. It may be a derivation from the root of the Latin verb partior (“to divide, to share”) + prefix com- (“with”). Another hypothesis that it may be derived from French compère (“partner”) + -sion, based on an earlier use of the French compérage to denote the practice of brothers-in-law sharing wives observed among Tupi people of the Brazilian Amazon, is less plausible.
First Known Use—1970s
Compersion is the positive emotion one feels when one sees their partner involved with another person. It’s often called the “opposite of jealousy.” Try to imagine a warm feeling you may experience when you see your best friend snuggled up with their spouse. You might think, “Wow. I’m so happy they’re happy. It’s nice to see them being treated well!” Now, try to imagine that you’re feeling that same happy emotion, but for your partner. Compersion is about deriving joy from seeing another person’s joy. It’s about empathizing with their happiness. If you’ve ever been happy for someone else, you’ve experienced something like compersion.—Sian Ferguson, April 19, 2022
“Compersion” originated in the polyamorous community. But is compersion exclusive to non-monogamous relationships? Not necessarily. I have found many monogamous people can identify compersion once they know how to name it. How can monogamous people feel compersion if their partners aren’t dating other people? Every possible stimulus for jealousy is also an opportunity for compersion. Monogamous people might feel joy at their partners’ close friendships, work wins, and other positive experiences.”—Jodi Hamilton, PhD
Compersion used in a sentence:
I experienced a strong sense of compersion seeing my sister’s happiness after her successful job interview.
I experienced compersion watching my daughter win her first soccer game.
Seeing them giggle like teenagers as they came in from a date filled me with compersion.
Compersion used on the web:
If you took the word “compersion”—which is all about loving other people having love and pleasure—and put it into a kaleidoscope, and then took the color hot pink.—New York Times
Rich: His compersion is flowing.—Slate
Please submit your compersion experiences or any word you may like to share along with your insights and comments to [email protected].